Thursday, January 10, 2008

Feeling Sentimental

D: Birthdays are something that I usually look forward to. I love birthdays. I love birthday cake, birthday candles, birthday spankings and of course birthday gifts. I love singing the birthday song as loud as I can and watching the birthday boy/girl squirm with modesty. I have always appreciated that there was one day each year when I was allowed to gush over those who I love, to remind them what they mean to me, and to truly celebrate their life.

My children’s first birthday is just around the corner. Yesterday I was trying to get into the excitement of party planning and headed off to the party store in search of party hats and birthday candles. Yet, it was only after a few minutes of shopping that I found myself standing in the middle of the kid’s birthday isle, holding two big wax candles in the shape of a ONE and I started to cry.

I know I should be eagerly anticipating that delightful day, filled with friends, song, cake and presents. Instead I am left feeling overly sentimental about their birthday... the day my life changed in the most amazing and profound ways. I can’t help but get weepy when I marvel at how incredible their first year of life has been and how lucky we are to have them in our lives. I fondly reflect on our struggles together and the milestones they have achieved. I am also very apprehensive about reaching that goal of one year of breastfeeding and dreading the end of our mother/child connection (that I’m sure will be replaced quickly with an equally lasting bond).

So now I am stuck trying to figure out how I could ever possibly convey to my children how much they mean to me and how much their birthday means to me. And even though our plans for their birthday is to keep things low key, I now realize why parents get all weird and do something ridiculously impractical for their children's birthdays like buying them a pony.

Posted by Walker Lockhart @ 9:11 PM

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Oh my goodness! I can't believe it has been a year already! I miss you guys and can't believe how much the boys have grown.

We should catch up sometime, it would be great to see you! I don't know if you have my email: lebrock at gmail dot com. Tell Walks I said hi!

Much love, Brock

Posted by Blogger Laura @ Friday, January 11, 2008 10:24:00 AM #

A tear welled up in my eye when I discoverd a tooth budding in B's mouth...I can't imagine the feeling of celebrating the first birthday of your lovely little boys. Dana birthdays have always been the most fun...why should your boys have anything but????

Posted by Blogger Team Bartz @ Sunday, January 13, 2008 6:44:00 PM #

I started tearing up at the party supply store too, except I was in the cake decorating aisle. I guess choosing which cake pan I would use for their first birthday cakes was too much.


Posted by Anonymous Carrie-Finn & Reid's Momma @ Tuesday, January 15, 2008 3:16:00 PM #
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