Sunday, May 13, 2007
Happy Mothers Day!
D: I have never been happier. I have a wonderful husband, great dogs, a fantastic house in a fun community and the best kids anyone could ask for. These are the first thoughts I had this morning when I woke up on Mother's Day. That, and "man, do I ever deserve this holiday!"
Don't get me wrong; I love being a mom more than I could ever have known I would. My heart swells with the thought of how much I love my children.
But being a mom is also harder than I ever thought it would be, for that very same reason. It is because of that intense love that I find myself questioning every decision I make, pulling my 'guilt card' out every other day for some reason or another, and always putting their needs way before mine.
I now realize that it is only natural for new moms to feel so neurotic about their children, for it is these intense emotions that help us to bond with our kids and help us to respond to their needs. Some evenings I look back on the day and recall the perfect symphony that my babies and I have conducted; while other times it sounds more like an adolescent school band, stumbling through each measure, completely out of tune.
Everyday I am learning how to be a good mother to my children. Today I reflect on my instincts and where they originated. My mother taught me to love unconditionally, for that is how she loved her children. Already, I am learning this is the most important aspect of motherhood.
And then there is the unexplainable natural bond that forms way before your children are born. It’s as if you've just grown another limb and are learning how to use it for the first time. This natural bond can feel so unnatural and clumsy and at the same time so right. (More about this in a later post as I explain my over dramatic attempt to semi-wean the boys off the breast, to get them ready for day care.)
This Mother's Day I pay tribute and respect to all mothers in a way I never have before. We’ve got one hell of a job to do, and have so much to learn from our children along the way. W has been very sweet today, honoring this holiday with flowers and gifts (“from the boys”) and treating me with yummy eats and champagne.
This could very well be my new favorite day of the year!
(I will write soon about my travel tips, from last week’s trip to Colorado with the boys…complete with pictures of course!)
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Can't wait for the travel tips...We are in need of them. We leave for Seattle and then Chicago in two weeks. I'm not worried about the short flights to Seattle and then to Chicago...it is the 7 hour straight shot back to Anchorage that I am dreading...!!
Happy (first) Mother's Day!!
I'm proud of you, Dana. You're a great mom.
love, Mom