Friday, February 23, 2007
Just like dad
W: It's the little things that people don't tell you about that are the most intriguing part of being a new parent. Everyone tells you about the big stuff like sleep routines and that baby boys pee on you. What we've discovered on our own is that babies grunt just like Beavis and Butthead, that they love the new Shins album, and - my favorite - that, before they learn to focus, babies look at you cross-eyed.
I love that they are cross-eyed because - and this is a true story - two years ago one of my classmates pointed out that I read exceptionally close to my face. Sure enough, the next time I picked up book, I checked, and guess what? The book was 8 to 10 inches away from my nose.
So, I went to the eye doctor for an exam. After the tests, the doc came out and gave me the old, "I've got good news, and I've got bad news" line. He went on to explain the good news, "Well, Walker, the good news is that you don't need glasses."
OK, I thought, then what could be the bad news? He went on to explain, "There's a difference between 'focal point' and 'convergence.' You can focus on objects just fine, but your eyes 'converge' closer to your face than your 'focal point.'" Wait, huh?
Suddenly, the implication of his diagnosis dawned on me, but I wanted to hear him say it.
He continued, "W, there isn't a good way say this, but you're 10% cross-eyed in both of your eyes." I'm what?!!! "That's right, you're cross-eyed, and not only that, when you close one eye, you're 20% cross-eyed in the open eye." By this time, I'd almost fallen out of my chair laughing. The doc seemed to appreciate that I took the 'bad news' so well.
So, that's why, when the Deuce gazes at me, bright and cross-eyed, I feel all warm and fuzzy inside - they're taking after their dad, and that feels great.
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This post was especially touching to me, a 5% cross-eyed in one eye person. Cross-eyed peeps unite!